Dolly Triple D Parton or as I like to say Backwoods Barbie

WOW! Those boobs just get bigger and bigger. So, Dolly was on idol at some point recently. And she is just the bomb - and you know I loved 9to5, and Rhinestone Cowboy. Best little whorehouse in texas was lacking something namely a good script. And I love singing Islands In the Stream.

Her laugh is cute - but she does look like her top half could detach from her body and float into the ether. Nonethless she is fabulous - even if she thinks she's still 70 I can see where she would be confused since I think she and Joan Rivers are tied for the most surgery - except Dolly went to someone who graduated from med school and Joan went to Don Rickles. ANYWAY, I still digress. So the contestants have to do Parton songs.

1. Brooke - I love her. She sang Joleen - great song. She is pretty consistent.
2. My boy Cook - something about a bird - good but listen to me his version of BILLIE JEAN rocked the house. Try to catch it on youtube if you can.
3. Ramiele - forgettable. so much so i forgot the song completely. I really do not like her at all.
4. Jason - blue eyed dread boy. I adore him and think he is the bomb. Travelling through. PERFECT SONG and JDOG needs to do this song.
5. Irish Tattoo girl. Here you come again. I love this song and she made it a ballad and well - it is one of those songs that I like to rock on. ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS SMILE THAT SMILE> THERE GO ALL MY DEFENSES......but this chick rocks. I need to fix my GD ipod because all my muzac is in there and I have been relegated to listening to the CD player which is just too limited and doesnt really help my vastly changing moods.
6. Little David - Not suprising did a ballad. poor dolly almost lost her fake eyeballs or was that eyelashes. Some jesus song i think smokey mountain jesus. he is cute AND THAT WILL KEEP HIM ON THIS. Ooops sorry for all caps. Anyway, the issue with David is that he's been Clayed. That is, his ballads will make him just like Clay - he is and will be adored by the young kids, older women, divorcees, lesbians, all the world over. We will wear out shirts that say Davemate and spend way too much money on tickets. But hey I will not go see him in spamalot!
7. Christie is horrendous - how the heck is this bimbo still on the show. I really dont understand because she does not have a lick of talent.
8. Syesha - I think it is ballsy to sit on a piano on idol. I further think hooking yourself up with a bad weave on said piano is even worse. But this woman has pipes. She is no whitney - well neither is whitney. She's no Dolly either. But she sort of is this weird cross between whitney and mariah and she wants to be Rhianna and maybe beyonce but basically she needs to just chill and be herself because she can really sing - even if her hair whack and she cried.
9. That Aussie, Its all Wrong and its all right. Jdog calls him the bizareo world Jim Morrison. I call him the aussie who makes that weird face that makes me want to punch him. But why argue about the little things. He does rock out even though he wears an ascot. I remember reading an article when I was a kid that
explained why people with accents dont have accents when they sing. hhmmm can't remember now.

Paula is drunked or stoned again. Not shocking.

I cannot believe Dolly wrote all those songs. I didn't know she wrote songs at all. curious. rock on with your bad self.

A couple things - Backwoods Barbie. Honestly I am not sure what to think. She is sort of a 90 year old characterature of herself. She wore a white outfit that included stilettos, capri hotpants, and a a cape thing. and she spoke instead of sang. Now I love her and really need to go to Dollywood! but I dont think I will buy this album. Its probably better than that Dolly tribute that I bought but Jesus and Gravity just aint doin it for me.